Tuesday, May 22, 2012

The birth of Reagan Lynn

My last evening being pregnant
The day I had my C-section was the very day I told myself that I will not give birth this way again!! It works for some people but not me!!
I prepared for the birth of Reagan long before she was even conceived. I attended local ICAN meetings, researched doctors, read books,read internet articles and whatever I needed to do to feel confident that a VBAC was in my future!!
I found out I was pregnant in March of 2011 and was so excited!! I immediately started preparing myself for the birth I wanted. I started preparing emotionally and physically for everything possible. I continued going to the ICAN meetings, educated myself, hired a doula, and took the best care of my body that I could.
I found an excellent OB that was very supportive of VBACs, in fact she had two of them herself!!
Only downfall for her was she was only  going to allow me to go to 41 weeks. I just figured I d cross that bridge when the time came.
I had a wonderful 9 months of pregnancy and then lovely EDD arrived and no sign of baby. I made it clear to my healthcare provider that I didn't want any intervention until my due date had come, and she agreed.
I first wanted to try Acupuncture so I went twice that week and it did nothing for me. At the end of the week I had my membranes stripped, and still nothing!! This was done on a Thursday which put me at 40 weeks and 3 days. I had been losing my mucus plug all week so I wasn't to concerned at this point knowing my body was working. I also knew 41 weeks was approaching and my Dr. was going to want me induced. I stopped thinking about it I didn't want anything negative to effect me and my baby coming.
Thursday night at 10pm I get a voice mail from my Dr. telling me she has to leave on vacation early so I need to be in the hospital at 5am to be induced.
 I started balling and thought this is it I might as well walk right into the OR and have a c section. My husband let me cry and get it all out for about 15 minutes then decided to chime in. He told me it was my choice and I didn't have to go to her we could find someone else!!! Who would take me at almost 41 weeks pregnant...no one is all I could think.
I called my doctor in the morning and told her I don't want to be induced and I would go ahead and meet her back up doctor. I had an appointment with her later on that day.
I walked into her office and the first thing she said to me was, you know you baby hasn't come yet because he/she is too big and isn't going to fit. I read your report with your first birth and it's going to end the same way. she said she set up my induction at Scottsdale Shea for first thing Monday morning. I didn't say a word to her and walked out! I cried all the way home and sent a text to my doula for some advice. She gave me some midwives I could try and see if I could get in.
I finally found the one at 40 weeks and 5 days  pregnant...phewww!!!
Still no sign of  baby...despite the chiropractic care, walking 2 miles a day, and acupuncture, this baby was happy where she was.
I had an NST on Tuesday December 6th which put me at 41 weeks and 2 days. That morning was the first time I really started having uncomfortable contractions, but they were 15 minutes or so apart. My appointment was at 4:00 that day and I was so uncomfortable all the way there, I even had my mom drive. My contractions were 8-10 minutes apart and pretty painful. She hooked me up to the monitors and said baby looked great and my contractions weren't very strong or consistent. That sure wasn't what I was feeling so I was a little frustrated.
I was in so much pain on the way home contractions 5-6 minutes apart, I made my mom stop at In and Out for a big burger :) Despite what my midwife said I knew this baby was coming soon.
I got home around 6pm and ate my dinner and decided to make sure everything was ready. At that point around 7pm my contractions were about 4-5 minutes apart so I sent a text to my doula and told her I was going to take a bath and try and get some sleep. I got in the bath which lasted at most 5 minutes, it was soooo not a comfortable place for me. I was having real bad back labor, nothing I had prepared myself for.
9pm I told my husband to take my daughter to my parents house NOW!!!
I tried to lay in bed and immediately jumped right out of bed, the only thing I could do was stand and pace. I timed my contractions again and they were 2 minutes apart and that's being generous...what the heck is happening was all I could think. How could they go from 6 minutes apart to 2 that quickly.
My husband got home and saw they were 1 and 1/2 to 2minutes apart and started getting a little freaked out.
I called my doula and told her to meet me at the hospital!!! Then I called my midwife and told her I was coming
It was the longest 25 minute drive, I was so uncomfortable and didn't get much of a break between my contractions.
I arrived at St. Joe's around 11pm and chose too walk over a wheel chair into triage. They immediately took me back there to check me.....As soon as I got to the bed my water broke! I was relieved to know my body was working and doing what it needed to do to get this baby out!
When they checked me I was dilated to a 3.....I was so upset I cried!! I was so sure I was further than that, and since my water broke there was really no turning back.

I went from Triage to labor and delivery room and got situated. I could barely handle the back labor at this point, I couldn't sit, use my exercise ball, shower or really anything. My contractions were about a minute apart at this time so no recovery or rest time for me to even breathe. I hung myself over my doula yelling words I didn't mean, pain you can't even begin to describe. I did this for a few hours and finally asked for an epidural. I knew I didn't want one and they tried to talk me out of it but I knew there was no way I was going to relax enough to let anything happen. The babies heart rate was not handling my contractions being so close together. I got my epidural about an hour later. My nurse got them to give me a "walking epidural"  The walking epidural is not designed to make you feel deadened. It is designed to provide enough pain relief that you are comfortable and yet still aware of the contractions. So it will not mask extraordinary pain but it will give you some relief and it did just that. I was still able to feel my legs and move them, i could get up if I wanted to, although they didn't advise me to walk around.
They came in and checked me only to find I was still at a 3. All I could think was I have to do something to get this going or else. The baby wasn't tolerating labor well at all so I was put on oxygen. I got on my hands and knee's and labored like that for the next 2 hours until they came in and told me again baby isn't looking good we need you to change positions. Right at that time my midwife came in to check me and some good news I was at a 7. I was so relieved to hear that and started getting more positive!! Then comes some bad news about 5 minutes later, my contractions needed to be slowed down because the baby wasn't tolerating them at all and they started talking emergency c section. They wanted to give me magnesium to give the baby a break. All I could think was a friend of mine ended up with her c section because of the magnesium, it made her blood pressure sky rocket. My midwife explained it would be fine it would give me and the baby a break for a bit. I trusted her and went ahead and did it. I sure wasn't able to sleep because my contractions were pretty intense but they came about every 5-6 minutes instead of every minute. I had no effects from it and in about 2 hours everything started kicking in again naturally. At this point the Dr. came in to check me and said I was a  good 9. I cried I was so happy, I made it past my 8 centimeters which is where I got stuck at with my daughter that ended in a c section. I was on cloud 9 at this point!! My doula encouraged me to eat a bit to get some energy back!! I ate a protein bar and tried to finish it before anyone came back in my room.
About 30 minutes later I started feeling the urge to push a bit, the resident came in to check me and said I was at a 7 and she's being generous, she said my cervix was swelling and the baby wasn't going to fit. I started losing all faith in everything, those were the exact words I heard from my Dr. right before they told me I was going to need a c section. I must not be able to push babies out of my vagina was all I was thinking. As much as I tried to muster up positive energy, it just wasn't happening.
Then I got that feeling to push again, and started getting mad.....why do I feel the urge to push but yet I"m only at a 7...why did the Dr just come and tell me I should be pushing very soon. This was all wrong and I'm not taking it from anyone. My doula was calm through everything and just stood by me and kept the positive words coming.
The nurse called the Dr and told them what the residents had said about only being at a 7 and they recommend a c section because baby isn't looking good either.
She came back and told me he is pissed and they're wrong, he knows what he felt when he checked me and I will be pushing this baby out. He called for the midwife to come and check on me and see what's up with the baby.
About 10 minutes later 12:50 pm my midwife walked in checked the heart tones on baby and said that baby is fine a little distressed but nothing to be concerned about! I told her I needed to push so she told me to do a trial push, at that moment she said we're having a baby!!! I knew the baby was posterior so I would have to give it my all and then some.
Next thing I know my legs are in my chest and everyone is yelling push....oh know I don't even know how to push is all I thought!! All the books, video's and research I did, never once did I learn how to push.  Apparently my body knew just what to do because she came out in 3 pushes 15 minutes later. On her way out my doula grabbed my hand and let me feel her head, it was the coolest thing to feel my baby's head. On my final push the baby turned in the right position and came out, they yelled it's a girl  and she was immediately placed on my chest. Absolute Perfection!!!!

Hubby cutting the cord

 My midwife said this baby is huge she looks like she's 3 months already.  I was crying tears of pure joy and happiness!! I did it and It was truly one of the best moments in my life. I held my baby girl for 40 minutes before anyone took her to clean her up.

my amazing doula

My midwife told me I was robbed of my first birth, that there was absolutely no reason I shouldn't have been able to push her out. My VBAC baby was larger and her head was larger. I was diagnosed with CPD with my c section baby and was told numerous time she was too big to fit.

I'm so happy I could feel the urge to push because I feel if I hadn't I wouldn't of argued with them about where my body was and that my body was ready to push. I couldn't feel anything with my first so I had no way of knowing anything.
The birth of Reagan Lynn was one of the best days of my life and I am and will continue to be proud of myself for the persistence and knowledge I obtained to have the birth I wanted!!
I didn't follow my birth plan completely but I did everything I felt I needed to do, I don't regret anything I did or anything that happened, this was the way my birth was supposed to be and I wouldn't of changed a thing.

My daughter meeting her sister for the first time

proud mama with he VBAC baby
My new family of four